Over the past few days, I've bumbled upon the term 'Pinterest'. At first, I thought it was some dumb Facebook deal where you collect buttons (remember that ?) and post them on a fake corkboard on your wall so everyone knows you like Metallica, you hate Bieber and You'd Rather Be Running. Whatevs.
Pinterest has nothing to do with buttons. Unless you're interested in making a button tree on a piece of framed canvas. Or a Christmas ornament out of buttons. Or if you want to convert an old door into a kitchen island or dining room table by covering it in buttons and then shellacing the shit out of it.
Pinterest: An online pinboard. Organize and share things you love.
And I'm fucked.
I've been on Pinterest for a solid three hours. I'm still waiting for them to send me the invitation so I can pin shit I love...somewhere.
Three hours to get an online invitation? Are you kidding me? Are they doing a fucking background check?
Has she ever been convicted of misusing a hot glue gun before?
Is she old enough to use the oven without adult supervision?
Does she have enough buttons?
I don't know what I just got myself into. But here are some things I'm going to try out. At some point. Once I can pin them to something and then get started.
|I could have a baby and try to make it look like Sophia Petrillo by gluing cotton balls to it's head.|
|I could do my hair with a sock.|
|I could use my leftover buttons to spruce up bobby pins to pin up my sock hair.|
|I could make classy-ass jello shots.|
|I could laugh at this turtle, who is clearly being held hostage.|
|I don't know what I should do with this. But if I could pin it somewhere, I might have time to figure it out.|
|I could get a bad ass mani.|
|I could poison my family.|
|I could knit cool shit.|
|20 years later, I could finally learn the moves to "Thriller"|
|I could take a walk down memory lane.|
|I could gag (they're vagina cupcakes).|
|I could...meh. Don't worry about it. I've probably already done that three times since you've seen this post.|
|Sweet Mother of Christ. More buttons.|
|I could work harder to get drunk.|
|I could buy 1,000 of these and hope that's enough to last me a lifetime.|
Send me my fucking invitation, already!