Tuesday, January 3, 2012

Shit Show

I feel bad for what I'm about to write: I can't wait for this fucking holiday to be over. 

It has occurred to me that mid-August to the beginning of the new year -- whatever new year that is -- is an absolute shit-show. Getting Husband back to school in mid-August. Getting kids back to school in early September. Two September birthdays to celebrate. Halloween. Husband's birthday. Thanksgiving. Christmas. New Year's. 

My future.
There are no breaks. It's 5 months of planning and implementing. 

I am tired. 

And I feel guilty that I have this overwhelming urge to deposit my children on the front stairs of their school and tell them to just sit tight 'til school resumes on Monday.

I can't keep anything clean while they're here with me all day. And the mess of having four of us here all day, every day for the past 10 days looms up front. 

Bills need paid. Receipts need to be reviewed and filed. That stupid fucking Christmas tree needs to be un-decorated and thrown out. It all needs to be mopped and dusted. And I know that if I spend their vacation time doing it, I'll feel like a bad mom.

It's waiting for me.

I need three months of cold, grey nothingness so I can recover. Thankfully, I live in Chicago so I'll get exactly what I'm asking for.



1 comment:

  1. My kids went back to school today - the return to routine is glorious.

    Hold on tight - that first cup of coffee in the quiet of the morning (or watching the news in bed)is soooooo worth it.

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